perfectinhisworld asked:
First of all, its a long distance relationship going on 4 years. My bf is very trustworthy, and everything he tells me is completely validated, but is it still inappropriate that he is staying with her? Its not like hes homeless. He can always go live with his grandfather and every now and then stay with his other guy friends. But he’s too stubborn to because his grandfather annoys him. But i was in the same situation with my mom. and if i had to choose between living with a close guy friend and living with my mom, i would live with my mom out of respect for my bf. Because i was raised to believe that living/spending the night with an unrelated member of the opposite *** is inappropriate even if you’re single. Ok i’ll be honest, im a little insecure, but i do completely trust him and the girl. shes sweet, but i do get jealous and upset very often because she gets to spend a lot of time with him that i dont as an ldr couple. and he should be allowed to have fun and hang out with who he wants to, but sometimes i dont like that theyre 24/7 in the same house. And his grandfather and mom dont think its appropriate either. i mean, the girl’s aunt and 9 year old cousin live there as well so theyre not alone, (even though he spent two nights there alone with her?. And he stays online and i call him often so i know nothign is going on, but i still think its morally inappropraite that while im here, missing him like crazy, hes living with another girl who gets to be with him 24/7. and they watch tv together and play guitar hero and such. btw, im 19, hes 20. and other than this problem, we have a very healthy relationship.
Ok, to clear up, this has only been for about three weeks. and please stop giving me long distance advice. You probably havent been in one as long as i have. and we both dont have a lot of money right now. please stop asking why arent we living together. its because we wouldnt have anywhere to live together. i have to stay and live with my grandmother to take care of her, and he’s working his *** off just to have somewhere to stay. stop telling me if he loved me he would do anything for me. Because I dont expect him to starve because Im selfish and i wanna go live with him. Please stop giving me advice on things that I dont need advice on. It’s ignorant and arrogant of you to assume things that I never even mentioned. Probably cause you watch way too much Dr. Phil. We have met in person and this is ONE problem I have had with him and I wanted someone else’s opinion. Not someone’s analysis of my whole relationship. Please answer the question I gave you, not your ignorant analysis.
Ok, to clear up, this has only been for about three weeks. and please stop giving me long distance advice. You probably havent been in one as long as i have. and we both dont have a lot of money right now. please stop asking why arent we living together. its because we wouldnt have anywhere to live together. i have to stay and live with my grandmother to take care of her, and he’s working his *** off just to have somewhere to stay. stop telling me if he loved me he would do anything for me. Because I dont expect him to starve because Im selfish and i wanna go live with him. Please stop giving me advice on things that I dont need advice on. It’s ignorant and arrogant of you to assume things that I never even mentioned. Probably cause you watch way too much Dr. Phil. We have met in person and this is ONE problem I have had with him and I wanted someone else’s opinion. Not someone’s analysis of my whole relationship. Please answer the question I gave you, not your ignorant analysis.
Caren
First of all, its a long distance relationship going on 4 years. My bf is very trustworthy, and everything he tells me is completely validated, but is it still inappropriate that he is staying with her? Its not like hes homeless. He can always go live with his grandfather and every now and then stay with his other guy friends. But he’s too stubborn to because his grandfather annoys him. But i was in the same situation with my mom. and if i had to choose between living with a close guy friend and living with my mom, i would live with my mom out of respect for my bf. Because i was raised to believe that living/spending the night with an unrelated member of the opposite *** is inappropriate even if you’re single. Ok i’ll be honest, im a little insecure, but i do completely trust him and the girl. shes sweet, but i do get jealous and upset very often because she gets to spend a lot of time with him that i dont as an ldr couple. and he should be allowed to have fun and hang out with who he wants to, but sometimes i dont like that theyre 24/7 in the same house. And his grandfather and mom dont think its appropriate either. i mean, the girl’s aunt and 9 year old cousin live there as well so theyre not alone, (even though he spent two nights there alone with her?. And he stays online and i call him often so i know nothign is going on, but i still think its morally inappropraite that while im here, missing him like crazy, hes living with another girl who gets to be with him 24/7. and they watch tv together and play guitar hero and such. btw, im 19, hes 20. and other than this problem, we have a very healthy relationship.
Ok, to clear up, this has only been for about three weeks. and please stop giving me long distance advice. You probably havent been in one as long as i have. and we both dont have a lot of money right now. please stop asking why arent we living together. its because we wouldnt have anywhere to live together. i have to stay and live with my grandmother to take care of her, and he’s working his *** off just to have somewhere to stay. stop telling me if he loved me he would do anything for me. Because I dont expect him to starve because Im selfish and i wanna go live with him. Please stop giving me advice on things that I dont need advice on. It’s ignorant and arrogant of you to assume things that I never even mentioned. Probably cause you watch way too much Dr. Phil. We have met in person and this is ONE problem I have had with him and I wanted someone else’s opinion. Not someone’s analysis of my whole relationship. Please answer the question I gave you, not your ignorant analysis.
Ok, to clear up, this has only been for about three weeks. and please stop giving me long distance advice. You probably havent been in one as long as i have. and we both dont have a lot of money right now. please stop asking why arent we living together. its because we wouldnt have anywhere to live together. i have to stay and live with my grandmother to take care of her, and he’s working his *** off just to have somewhere to stay. stop telling me if he loved me he would do anything for me. Because I dont expect him to starve because Im selfish and i wanna go live with him. Please stop giving me advice on things that I dont need advice on. It’s ignorant and arrogant of you to assume things that I never even mentioned. Probably cause you watch way too much Dr. Phil. We have met in person and this is ONE problem I have had with him and I wanted someone else’s opinion. Not someone’s analysis of my whole relationship. Please answer the question I gave you, not your ignorant analysis.
Caren
Are you suuure it’s a healthy relationship?
^ same here?
It sounds like you already know the answer to your question. Does your BF know how you feel? How often do you see each other?What keeps him so far away? Can he move closer to you? Is he as commited to the relationship as you are? If he knows it bothers you and continues to live there; he is showing by his actions that he does not value and respect you. Remenber his words and actions should both be giving you the same message. Good Luck!
NO, it’s not appropriate at all!
That doesn’t sound like a healthy relationship.
answer mine
For four years wouldnt you guys moved closer to be together.